Friday, October 20, 2006

I Heart NY

i had a handful of days i had to take off by october 1st, lest i lose them to the rolling cogs and cranks of the paid vacation machine. i could afford a couple of discount plane tickets, but not hotel accomadations, so... i went a-visiting. trips are always cheaper when you couch surf! i actually spent 4 days in san francisco first, but i don't have any pictures from that trip yet (eric promises they're in the mail), so new york gets to be immortalized in blog-form before the foggy city. unfortunately, i wasn't feeling very trigger-happy in the big apple, and the pictures i did take came out weird and blurry for the most part. (note to self: must re-aquaint self with camera. read self's camera manual.) anyway, i'll incude the ones i messed around in photoshop enough to satisfy my need to attempt to fix unfixable images.


by the time i got in, my jet-setting german friends bianca and gerrit had already been seeing the sights for a few days, so i didn't end up getting in much touristy-type action. we did walk through central park, however. we also partook in lots and lots of delicious junk food. here they are, sharing a yummy central park hot dog (with a dash of cliché). and here they are again, soaking in the ambiance at a divey cafe near the park in madison square (after we ate amazing burgers at the shake shack):


jen was nice enough to put me up in her tiny but welcoming studio. she's attending columbia medical, but still managed to find time to play soccer on a women's league (her team is associated with an irish pub. quite the bunch of heavily-accented characters), as well as other athletic-type activities. honestly, she puts me to shame. i got to accompany her to a game. i got tired just watching her run around.

i also managed to meet up with an old face from my year in bordeaux, jason chau. speaking of friends who put me to shame, this guy not only spent a few years in niger with the peace corps, but also went on to work in pakistan with amnesty international. he acted as an adviser to PRESIDENT MUSHARRAF. that's right, this guy. jason also, bizarrely, acted as ben kingsley's guide while he was in the area (doing research for a documentary... i think?). here's a surreal photo of jason with musharraf, kingsley, and some other various important people i don't recognize:



coincidentally, jen and i watched the good general's interview with jon stewart on the daily show website the night before i hung out with jason. it's pretty hilarious. in any case, it was great to see him again. he's done a lot of learning, etc, but he's still got the same sarcastic charm he always had. we went to see "The science of sleep," which i highly recommend. it left me in an otherworldly state of mind, which became all the more magnified as i watched the fraggle-like underground construction in the subway tunnels on the way back to jen's place. here's a couple more shots of jason and i hanging out in the subway. we are SO new york:



here's to the hope that my next visit will be longer. as it was, i had just enough time to really understand what the term "new york minute" means. alas.

Tuesday, October 17, 2006

Soapbox Antics


i had the pleasure of witnessing the spectacle of the pdx soapbox derby this year. my coworker zach helps organize the event, and he was nice enough to hire me to do the above logo. i can steal design with the best of them!

and, speaking of the best of them, some of my portland nearest and dearest turned out for the fun as well. they were all wearing their most ecstatic facial expressions. can i hear a roll call??

ruth!

isaac!

demo!

brody!

etta!

lyndsay and brandon!

allen and girl i only met once!

david hasslehoff!

rude skater kids!

random goth punk guy!

and me!

yes. i am one of my own nearest and dearest. shut up.

ahem.

the excitement was palpable. who would win?? would it be...

satan claus?

the crazy engineer?

the mail order brides?

batman?

chariot guy?

or perhaps, my personal favorite... the cubicle workers?? (they had a functioning drinking fountain!!)

... or could it be one of the many soapbox teams we missed seeing because we slept in too late and showed up in the middle of the second round???!!

i actually have no idea. we left early. but not before we got to witness the gory after effects of the bath tub betties' full-speed crash:


ouch. not to worry. they were supplied with plenty of alcohol to disinfect their wounds (and numb the pain). good times. good times.

Monday, October 16, 2006

Serious Sex Stuff

hello gentle reader. so, it's been a long time since the good head came back. i won't make excuses. i have a handful of posts i want to get to in the next few days, but to get the ball rolling, i'm going to copy and paste a response i wrote to a bulletin my sister posted on myspace. the article it refers to is pasted at the end of my response, so it might make more sense to read that first. i realize this is more serious than i usually get on here, but i thought a lot about what i wrote, and i figured i may as well record it for posterity. (and maybe start some sort of dialogue?) i promise to go back to being ridiculous in my next post. i realize some of my opinions are far from popular, and i welcome the input of anyone who cares to share how they feel about the subjects brought up. i may be more in the dark than i realize. anyway, here you go:

this is an interesting article, eva, with a lot of thought-provoking points, but i think (particularly in the particular case it is referring to), it is rather misguided. from what the media has told us (which, admittedly, is rarely enough to form an educated opinion) it would seem that the man who attacked the amish school was not so much suffering from issues of misogyny as issues of pedophilia. he made the adult female teachers leave the building (along with the male students), and kept only the female children hostage. he is said to have been wracked with guilt for his previous act of molesting young girls, among other traumatic issues. this case could be more accurately compared to the tragic and numerous cover-ups of child molestation in the catholic church than it could be to hate crimes towards (adult) women. just as a man molesting a young boy should not be compared to homosexuality (wherein both partners are consenting adults), a man molesting young girls should not be equated with issues dealing with heterosexual sexuality. pedophilia is it's own issue, and should be treated as such.

i believe that we, as a society, need to take a hard look at how we handle the issue of pedophilia. there are no childhood/adolescent programs to teach young people what to do if they are worried that they may be experiencing signs of this type of behavior. we have programs for anger management, we talk openly about the problems of violence, drugs, gangs, cigarettes, alcoholism, etc with our youth... and we have (albeit, substandard) sex education classes in public schools, but the only advice we ever give kids about pedophilia is "if a grown-up touches you, tell a teacher or your parents."

the sad truth is, pedophiles start out as kids themselves. they start having sexual urges towards younger children when they go through adolescence. by the time they are adults who have been fighting (or, even worse, giving in to) these urges for years and years, it is very likely too late for therapy to effectively change their behavior. sexual urges are among the strongest of human impulses, and become hardwired in the brain at an early age. from what we've been told, the man who committed the amish school slayings was wracked with guilt about what he had done years before, and he knew what he was going to do was also terrible thing, but he felt he was helpless to stop himself. maybe, if he had gotten therapy immediately after (or even better, before) the first time he acted on his urges (when he was 12 years old), his life and the lives of his victims could have been dramatically different. instead, pedophilia is so demonized that people who have these feelings have no where to go, and no one to tell. their lives would be instantly ruined if they confessed the mental issues they were struggling with. i'm certainly not saying that pedophiles should be treated lightly. as i said, i think it is very unlikely that a person who has had sexual urges towards children their whole life can be effectively "cured" of these issues and thus he/she poses a real threat to society. but i do believe that we are doing almost nothing to deal with the root of the problem.

as for lumping sexually suggestive commercials, hard-core porn, gangsa rap, video games, and fashion into the same the-world-against-women industry... well, i've got to take issue with that, too. i'm not saying that i haven't been offended by a small portion of each of these categories, but what is this article suggesting? that we should censor all of these things? there are other countries that do censor these things, and very strictly so. they don't show sexualized images of women on tv. they don't allow porn or lots of kinds of music. they ban sexually suggestive games and clothing. they also make women wear burkas and don't let them leave the house without a male family member as an escort. they kill women who are raped (and yes, they are still raped) because of the shame it brings on the family. women aren't allowed to be educated or independent or hold important jobs. i don't see how censorship is going to help the situation in the U.S.

i'd like to add (although many feminists would probably disagree with me) that i don't believe pornography and prostitution are inherently misogynistic. sexuality is a complex, crazy thing. some people (women too) like to fantasize about things they wouldn't want to experience in real life. i've talked to girls who have rape/bdsm fantasies that they are ashamed of, because they think that playing a submissive role in their sex lives is inherently antifeminist, when in fact lots of independent/strong people – men too – tend to like this kind of role reversal in bed. it's a role they don't play in their everyday lives, which can make it exciting and taboo to explore with a dominant partner. the fact is, there's all kinds of porn. there's porn for every sexual taste out there. now, i'm not saying that snuff films or porn in which people are actually being hurt against their will (or they are too young to legally consent) should be tolerated... but for the most part, it's fantasy. maybe some of the women who appear in porn would have chosen to do something else as a career if they had higher self esteems and better education, but i've read interviews with some porn stars (and escorts/strippers/other sex industry workers) who say they love their jobs. for some, it's the best means they have to support their families and have a flexible enough schedule to spend time with their kids. if we're really concerned with the welfare of women (and men) in the sex industry, then prostitution should be legalized and regulated. if we don't like "pimp culture," we should provide a safe and healthy environment for prostitution to occur, so that women wouldn't need to depend on men that may take advantage of them and treat them unfairly for protection... because just like abortion, it's not a choice as to whether prostitution exists or not. it is only a choice of how it exists.

i do, of course, agree that there is rampant sexism and misogyny in the u.s. media and in society as a whole, but i think the real answer is education. women need to be shown, from childhood, that they are worthy of respect and love from men and from each other, and men need to be taught that women are their social and sexual equals. people need to be taught that sexuality isn't something to be ashamed of, as long as it's between consenting adults. well educated people will recognize unfair and unhealthy images of women (and men) in the media, and they will reject them.

oh, and the "it's hard out here for a pimp" song is a personal favorite. in context of the film (hustle and flow), it works to emphasize the culture and experience of the character who writes it, and the film goes on to paint some of the most realistic, sympathetic and human portraits of female prostitute characters i have seen in modern film.

love. yer sis

* * * * *

Why Aren't We Shocked?
By BOB HERBERT
October 16th, 2006
NY Times Select

"Who needs a brain when you have these?"
--message on an Abercrombie & Fitch T-shirt for young women


In the recent shootings at an Amish schoolhouse in rural Pennsylvania and a large public high school in Colorado, the killers went out of their way to separate the girls from the boys, and then deliberately attacked only the girls.

Ten girls were shot and five killed at the Amish school. One girl was killed and a number of others were molested in the Colorado attack.

In the widespread coverage that followed these crimes, very little was made of the fact that only girls were targeted. Imagine if a gunman had gone into a school, separated the kids up on the basis of race or religion, and then shot only the black kids. Or only the white kids. Or only the Jews.

There would have been thunderous outrage. The country would have first recoiled in horror, and then mobilized in an effort to eradicate that kind of murderous bigotry. There would have been calls for action and reflection. And the attack would have been seen for what it really was: a hate crime.

None of that occurred because these were just girls, and we have become so accustomed to living in a society saturated with misogyny that violence against females is more or less to be expected. Stories about the rape, murder and mutilation of women and girls are staples of the news, as familiar to us as weather forecasts. The startling aspect of the Pennsylvania attack was that this terrible thing happened at a school in Amish country, not that it happened to girls.

The disrespectful, degrading, contemptuous treatment of women is so pervasive and so mainstream that it has just about lost its ability to shock. Guys at sporting events and other public venues have shown no qualms about raising an insistent chant to nearby women to show their breasts. An ad for a major long-distance telephone carrier shows three apparently naked women holding a billing statement from a competitor. The text asks, "When was the last time you got screwed?"

An ad for Clinique moisturizing lotion shows a woman's face with the lotion spattered across it to simulate the climactic shot of a porn video.

We have a problem. Staggering amounts of violence are unleashed on women every day, and there is no escaping the fact that in the most sensational stories, large segments of the population are titillated by that violence. We've been watching the sexualized image of the murdered 6-year-old JonBenet Ramsey for 10 years. JonBenet is dead. Her mother is dead. And we're still watching the video of this poor child prancing in lipstick and high heels.

What have we learned since then? That there's big money to be made from thongs, spandex tops and sexy makeovers for little girls. In a misogynistic culture, it's never too early to drill into the minds of girls that what really matters is their appearance and their ability to please men sexually.

A girl or woman is sexually assaulted every couple of minutes or so in the U.S. The number of seriously battered wives and girlfriends is far beyond the ability of any agency to count. We're all implicated in this carnage because the relentless violence against women and girls is linked at its core to the wider society's casual willingness to dehumanize women and girls, to see them first and foremost as sexual vessels - objects - and never, ever as the equals of men.

"Once you dehumanize somebody, everything is possible," said Taina Bien-Aimé, executive director of the women's advocacy group Equality Now.

That was never clearer than in some of the extreme forms of pornography that have spread like nuclear waste across mainstream America. Forget the embarrassed, inhibited raincoat crowd of the old days. Now Mr. Solid Citizen can come home, log on to this $7 billion mega-industry and get his kicks watching real women being beaten and sexually assaulted on Web sites with names like "Ravished Bride" and "Rough Sex: Where Whores Get Owned."

Then, of course, there's gangsta rap, and the video games where the players themselves get to maul and molest women, the rise of pimp culture (the Academy Award-winning song this year was "It's Hard Out Here for a Pimp"), and on and on.

You're deluded if you think this is all about fun and games. It's all part of a devastating continuum of misogyny that at its farthest extreme touches down in places like the one-room Amish schoolhouse in normally quiet Nickel Mines, Pa.